Earth to Asinine, Earth to Asinine

Here's a cliche: Wow, we haven't really been very good in keeping up our bloggery. How many bloggers write about not keep their blog content fresh? Scientifically speaking, I'd say 87 percent. But that's just from asking two people on the subway (one of whom was dressed as an Irish setter), so there's a margin of error of plus or minus three percent. But enough about me. How about the new contest? Haikus! We at the asinine offices are hoping that the perceived simplicity of this poetic form will drive up the amount of entries. Of course, at the same time we fear it will drive up the amount of bad entries. And haikus can be very very bad. And not funny. If you're looking for any guidance, just please make it funny, and make that last line really a kicker, an ironic or twisty 5 or 7 syllables (the 5-7-5 structure of the haiku may be shuffled around all you like--e.g., 7-5-5, 5-5-7) that sings, takes off, goes someplace perfectly fitting but perfectly unexpected. Either that or go for a fart joke.